Unhealthy relationships with the Tarot
Tarot reading is such a beautiful tool to help and assist with direction/guidance and planning for future events and I am so blessed to be able to help, because of my gifts and natural ability to read the cards. However on occasion as a professional tarot reading, I have people who become ‘reliant’ on tarot readings. They want to know exactly what is going to happen and when, and they can become quite vocal and angry if the tarot does not give them a response they like. Their “desperation” reeks; and to be truthful it makes me very uncomfortable. When I begin to tense up around the neck and shoulders, I know without a doubt it’s a ‘sign’ from above to either end the session; or if it’s an enquiry, not to take the appointment and mostly I will refer them on to someone more appropriate.
Please know this type of client is different to the client who simply wants some guidance and direction; I am talking about those people who live their life specifically by the cards. This is unhealthy, very unhealthy because people still have free will and have total control of their lives. The cards simply give a snapshot of what might happen – it’s not set in stone. I’m blessed that 95 per cent of my clients are here for direction and don’t become “desperate”.
I have so much gratitude and I am delighted that people love my services and love that my accuracy is very high. So I feel blessed that I am able to help and assist people through a tarot reading and that most people take a tarot reading for what it is; most people don’t become frantic with wanting a reading every few days.
One way to know the difference with someone who is becoming ‘desperate’ or ‘dependant’ is the number of times the same client contacts me. They may contact me every couple of days or weeks, asking for questions to be answered by the cards; or they want another full reading even if they’ve only just had one recently; or they are asking bizarre questions; I take this as a sign this person is reliant on a tarot reader and are not taking responsibility for their own life nor letting it unfold naturally. I was asked once “when am I going to die” That is HUGE red flag for me.
Some people may not be consciously aware of this dependence. This plea on me is heavy and uncomfortable, because people begin to yell and get agitated with me when the cards are not to their liking. I am not a god and no tarot reader is. I am not responsible for anyone’s life but my own. So this type of client is not a healthy client for me (or to themselves) and I will ultimately refuse to see them in the future if they don’t seek help from a professional.
On a number of occasions I have referred clients to counselling because their relationship with the tarot is unhealthy and harmful. These clients couldn’t make any ‘decisions’ about life without referring to the cards or booking in for an appointment. It’s a huge responsibility on my shoulders and one I’m not prepared to carry. My duty of care is to refer these people to more appropriate mental health agencies/doctors/counsellors/psychologist’s etc.
If a client is willing to do the hard work through counselling then the outcome can be very, very good for them. If the client refuses to see their behaviour and desperation is out of proportion than that becomes more difficult for a tarot reader, who may have to put their foot down and simply say “NO. I am not doing another reading for you.” I’ve be known to do this; and no doubt in the future I will have to do so again.
My ethics are strong. I will not read for someone who is ‘reliant’ on the cards for every little thing, and I will refer them along. I am not ‘all about the money’ which would be very easy to do when someone is reliant on the cards. These people don’t care how much they pay, as long as they are getting their ‘fix’. It would be very easy to rip people off who are in this frame of mind, however as I am a ‘healer’ and if I can’t help them, I will give them the name and number of someone who can. If the client doesn’t follow up, that becomes their issue. I have followed my strong ethical base and my duty of care.
When I first set up Tammy’s Tarot and Healing, I had an interstate client who fell into the above category and it was becoming quite uncomfortable with the amount of times she would ring, asking different questions and relying heavily on all I said. With love and compassion I suggested she seek counselling and I’m happy to say she did. The change in her as a person is profound and marvellous. She has blossomed into a more confident and well-functioning member of society. Had my ethics not been for the concern and well-being of my client, I would have allowed her to continuously ring, ring, ring and spend her hard earned money on tarot readings. She did not need this!! She required help of a professional to get to the bottom of her issues and to give her coping skills, to get through life. Now I may hear from this beautiful soul once every six months or more. It’s not about the money or ripping people off – it’s about the best for my clients.
Similarly people desperate for love will book in semi-regularly and ask the same questions over and over and over, about ‘when they are going to meet Mr. Right, what Mr. Right is going to look like. Their star sign and so on’ When, I start to see a pattern occurring with the same sort of questions about love and I see/hear/feel their desperation, then I will also put my foot down. I suggest they find a wonderful hobby and some friends and explain that having ‘somebody’ in their life will not magically fix their issues. These people sometimes need intervention from a professional as well. Sometimes people don’t understand they are sending out desperate energy which is uncomfortable for a reader and may be blocking their quest for love or abundance or happiness.
Whatever it is people are seeking, the Tarot can guide and give direction but it should not be used to answer all of life’s complexities and issues. We are responsible for our lives and the tarot is merely a tool to be used on occasion.Tarot should not be taken as gospel or used in replacement of your own free will. YOU are the driver and in control of your journey here on earth – so please use your free will in the best manner possible.
By all means gain some direction/guidance from a tarot reader on occasion, but don’t become reliant or desperate for the tarot to answer all your earthly issues. Only take away with you the stuff that resonates with you, don’t feel that what a tarot reader says is absolute!!! You are in control ALL the time so please don’t give away your power – it’s unnecessary and dangerous for you to do this. You OWN your life!! Never ever ever forget that or allow any ‘tarot’ reader to place fear into your heart.
Please, never become offended if I tell you that I won’t read your cards. It means I’ve detected ‘reliance’ in you, and I will generally suggest what I feel you need. It’s duty of care and it’s demonstrates my ethics. I won’t rip people off just to make a ‘buck’.
I hope this little blog about ‘unhealthy relationship with the tarot’ has been interesting and eye opening for you. It’s quite an interesting job that I do, and I love it with all my heart and I do so with integrity and love for my client, with their best interest at heart, at all times.
Love, light and harmony
(Reiki and Tarot Master/Teacher)